love life and live love

september 15/09

today has been an interesting day of sorts. it started with shelley and i taking misty (the dog) out ofr a nice morning walk. when we got back i spent some time checking out flight times and prices and found one that worked so i booked it. after lunch shelley took me to times office (hes a chiropractor) to try out this detox machine thats there.

it works by placing your feet in a hot tub of water and then a small machine works almost like a magnet, drawing out all the bad toxins from your body through your feet. when i was done my tub of water was a lovely shade of dark yellow with copious amounts of black flecks (from heavy metals in my body) floating around my ankles. i left feeling refreshed and renewed.

the remainder of the day was spent grocery shopping and relaxing in the warm sun. my thoughts continue to wander to the fact that i have officially booked my plane ticket to australia. september 22 i will be leaving and i honestly have no idea when i will return. its a strange concept. one for which i am both excited for but also a little nervous. i cant wait! :)

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tonight we all spent the evening watching "the biggest loser" season premiere. listenting to each of their stories and watching them all struggle through their first week of workouts i was inspired. here were 16 people who came on the show - each for different reasons - each a the end of their rope. ready for a change. and they pushed on. some thought of quitting. some wanted to give up. but they didnt. dreams in sight they kept on. they faught with sweat and tears to take that first step to becoming a better person. for friends. for family. for themselves. it made me wonder - what step do i need to take?


september 19/09

i am coming down the home stretch here and its hard to put into words how im feeling. it is a mix of emotions i feel bubbling up inside of me. part of me excited. part nervous. part of me reflects on all i have give up to get to this point. part dreams of what is yet to come.

i never realized how much i would miss what i have left behind. im not talking about being homesick. i feel as though this is something different entirely. its the moments when i wake up to scour through my very limited wardrobe all the while remembering my full closet of clothes back in calgary. its the moments when i contemplate what id like to do for the day and have trouble tearing myself from the unending desire to pick up a brush and paint a canvas. i have neither of those in my pack. all those tools have been left behind. along with my laptop. my sports equipment. my art supplies. its all so far out of reach.

when i was planningn on thhis journey, i was so focused on everything i would get to do, see and experience that i truely forgot about all i would leave behind. it was not as though i completely neglected to think about such things, i just simply did not process the impact it would have on me to walk away from it all.

but the minute all these thoughts come rushing into my head i am also reminded of all i am gaining from this extensive travelling experience. i have done more in the last 2.5 months than what some people get to do in a lifetime. and there is so much more yet to come - i cant wait!

these last 2 days i have at my cousins house (i leave tomorrow night for LA) are slightly sentimental as this is th emost time ive been able to spend with them in years. it also is the last few moments i will be in north america and i have no idea how long it will be before im back. its hard to even envision the change in me that will take place as i move forward in my journey.

that being said - today is going to be a hiking day. as mackenzie is working, it will just be tim, shelley and i exploring smith rock state park. its been said that people from all ove rthe world come to climb the numerous rock faces that are offered at the park. i only wish i had the skills and equipment to join them today. i suppose taking pictures of them with my camera will have to suffice.

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well - we have made it back from smith rock and it was fabulous! it was so much fun to just walk around, take in the fresh air and enjoy the experience of watching climbers make their way up and down various rock faces. im not going to lie - i totally wanted to be a part of what the climbers were doing, but i had to hold back. one day. one day i will do that.

it was also cool to be hiking in such a different environment that what i am used to from alberta and BC. i noticed the diference even between the 2 neighboring provinces in canada as i made my way towards the west coast, but here in oregon it is completely different from that entirely. it is more desert-like, with the dry dirt, rock and sage bush scattered across the land. when the breeze picks up it comes completely with dust particles that get caught up in your nasal passage as well as any other available crack, crease or sweaty body part you provide. the sun is hot and shade is rare - the trees are scattered and almost spindly as they try to survive in the arid conditions. but there is beauty. the rich reds of the rock. the twisted trunks of the trees. the view from the top of wherever a person is able to get to - its all gorgeous.

after our hike we headed off to see mackenzie at her work. it just so happens she works in a smoothie shop. i think since i have been here in bend i have been to get a smoothie almost 3 times, and that is not nearly enough to be able to taste all the delicious flavors that are offered there. maybe ill just have to come back one day then.....

in more pressing matters, exactly 27 hours from here i will be boarding a train to go to LA. i can hardly believe it is yet again another time to say goodbye. yet that also means it will be another time to say hello.....